I am a Game Developer

Game Update

I did some testing this week, but a lot of my efforts were focused on cleaning up my office. I took a look at some more ideas about creating a consumable system for the game. If I add any new features they have to already use what I’ve built and connect it in some way.

I keep going back to the game “Slay the Spire” mostly because I’m asking myself “why do I keep playing this game?” I feel like my answer is that it’s a combination of random cards and a lot of ideas of “what if x happens? How could that change my play pattern?” I’m trying to replicate some of that with the idea of some global artifacts. Again these global artifacts need to use the systems that I already have in place which could be difficult in and of itself.

Spent some time with my artist to get the things she needs to get the key art done. Hoping that we can move that along soon. It’s holding a lot of stuff up. I would say that I’m a little bit frustrated with the amount of direction I need to give in this area. That said, I’m sure that the final product will be worth it. This also led me to remember that I still don’t have a company logo, but more and more it might turn into the Six Aspects Color Wheel. I wouldn’t say that’s an official name for it.

Personal Update

Last week my sisters church had to vacate their storefront location which was pretty sad. It’s something they have been bracing for, for a while now. I’m doing the best I can to support them but it can be difficult here for them. It feels like a lot of changes are happening to me and the people I love lately. I hope that they will find something that will be a great fit for our church soon.

Next weekend I have a lot of exciting plans! I have to be careful not to project to much and just be in the moment so that I’m not let down, but it’s hard for me to help it. It’s interesting that it worked out so soon. I’m interested to see where things will go, and of course there will be a lot of drinking and dancing to be had.

Game Development Insight

I think I’m done talking about Dark Patterns for the foreseeable future. Instead I’d like to talk this week about “Atomic Habits” some more. Specifically, the idea that the things we do cast votes for the person we want to be. It’s pretty clear that the person I want to be is a Game Developer.

Halfway through my military career I told myself that I wanted to follow this path but I had no idea what that meant. At the time that didn’t amount to very much. Primarily, I listened to a YouTube channel called Extra Credits, I purchased a book titled “Game Programming All In One” which didn’t help much, and I went on twitter to talk about game development.

Then providence struck. Due to a work situation I was placed in a holding area in which I had extreme autonomy. I purchased a laptop and started to explore game development using RPG Maker, and I also met my now mentor Chris DeLeon. We have been working together for the past 8 years now. It’s why whenever someone asks about getting into game development I tell them to get a mentor and start paying them. It was life changing for me. I had direction now, and I had someone that could help me punch through barriers that I was continually hitting.

From there he encouraged me to start my own Game Development Club which I did in various capacities. Often I would be the only one to show up. I also spent time reading his book. Eventually I returned to work, but the fire had been lit now. I was still doing game streaming, but eventually I had to give that up due to my separation and eventual divorce.

There were some weeks in which the only game development I did was the one hour with Chris during our Skype sessions, but little by little we kept chipping away at Six Aspects. I also focused and finished my Computer Science Degree. Little by little without even knowing it I was becoming a Game Developer.

I tried a lot of things like 3D modeling in Blender, Pixel Art, etc… Eventually I figured out where my strengths were and so I focused on those areas. To me there was no such thing as wasted time, just choices which informed decisions. I never beat myself up, it was just exploring.

I wouldn’t say I became obsessed with what I was doing, but often I would get some motivation and take my work with me somewhere. On my lunch hours I would spend time working instead of socializing with people I worked with. I would take it to a coffee date and work before she showed up. I would work on an idea on the floor of my house moving cards and pieces around. I even took work to the bathroom to make more use of my time.

I made sacrifices, putting time into work instead of watching TV or being social. It’s likely that my choice to try and get the game to market in 2020 contributed to breaking up with someone very special to me. There were other things going on, but it can’t be denied that it contributed.

I spent my own money to hire out artists, and purchase assets. I was scrupulous in finding what I could afford learning how I wanted to run that part of the business. I experienced starting a business, and filing taxes even though I had no income due to my project not being completed yet. I took a month in Austin just to focus and really work on things holding myself to a schedule.

I created my own atomic habits without even knowing it, and I’m glad I fell into them now. At the beginning of this process I really didn’t know what I was doing and I would tell people, “I’m an aspiring Game Developer” but now I would say “I am a Game Developer.” I don’t think I could have done what I’ve accomplished without Chris working with me to set a schedule and keep me accountable to show up and “get my reps in”. Sometimes that’s all it takes.

I haven’t always been the most focused on game development over the years. I’ve had a life which has pulled me in many different directions. But just like the book “Atomic Habits” says, “You don’t have to be perfect, you just have to be consistent and not break the chain. Every time you do your habit you are casting a vote for the person you want to be. You only need a majority.” For me that vote tells me I am a Game Developer. This has become my identity now, and the only way someone could take it away would be to kill me.